Singapore : With the circuit breaker (CB) measures in place, families find themselves spending more time together at home.
This sudden transition to seeing your spouse, your children and for some; in-laws / parents daily at home calls for a huge adjustment. When you are at work or school, you get some personal space and your focus is mainly on the tasks that you are out of the house for. With CB, the personal space seems to have shrunk or reduced to zero for some people. You find yourself having to manage more than one area of responsibility.
What does this mean? The human brain does not like changes. All of us have a certain routine in living habits and when CB calls for a sudden disruption to these routines and forces a quick adaptation, we undergo a certain level of stress.
Everyone handles stress differently. For those who are looking for some tips to manage stresses at home currently, here are some methods that you may wish to try on your own:
- Our thoughts are powerful. They are the main drivers for how we feel.
“My child just wouldn’t listen to me; he is a disobedient kid.”
“Why can’t my spouse just understand that I need his help to cook while I’m busy with work too? Why does he think that my work is any less important?”
How does having such thoughts make you feel? Possibly angered, threatened and upset.
Now, having a shift in thoughts to a slightly neutral point-of-view would change the feelings.
Note: It doesn’t work when you think of all rainbows and unicorns. A neutral point-of-view is what we are looking for.
“My child is adjusting to being confined at home. He wants my attention from my work too.”
“My spouse may think that I can manage both housework and work. I need to let him know I need his help.”
Notice how the shift in thinking can help to change the feelings to something less stressful?
- Try to find some alone moment for that me-time. It could be from taking a walk to buy food, or standing at your door to look at the surroundings. Ask yourself what your five senses are telling you: what do you see, hear, smell, feel, taste? (some leftover food in the mouth from meals perhaps)
This is important as it brings you to the present moment where you spend time with no one but yourself. Even for that 10 minutes.
- Accept that you have no control over certain happenings at home. Kids messing up the house more than usual? It’s normal. Feeling tensions from other adults at home? It’s normal. And it’s okay. It really is.
Remember, it’s less about staying in control and trying to do as many things as possible.
It’s more about co-existing with issues and riding through this tough period until we are out of the woods.
Take care and if you need to talk to a professional about managing stress or anxiety, be in touch with help@oneemptychair.com.sg
